Lord Dank
"My bussy </3"—LordDank, Chat
Lord Dank first joined the Weeb's Cafe on February 26th, 2026.
Biography
Lord Dank is known for his easygoing demeanor and for his many tree naps. While he only sleeps one hour per night, he takes enough naps throughout the day to make up for the lack of sleep.
One night, he created The Farm in the Cafe's Fluxer server so that he could contain Morii for entertainment. However, Morii was unable to be rehabilitated, and the decision ended up causing quite a bit of server drama.
He is known to be everywhere and collects many flies in his evil web. For some reason, sickos seem to love him and think that he is one of them despite not being a gross incel. Do not mistake his relaxed, easy-going demeanor towards common bullshittery as an invitation to bring some actual disgusting fuckery into the server. He will simply make jokes as the other mods ban.
He has several cats, a garden, and grows his own weed.
What people have to say about Lord Dank
"Liches get bitches sounds like something dank would say." -Kirin
"The court finds Lord Dank not guilty of cuck." -Miku-chan, Le Pervert
"I'll overthrow dank." -Chemkii
"Dank is not very huggable." -Lord Dank lying about himself
"Dank has boobs now." -Chel
"My favorite mods are dank, leaf, banan, kirin, and eyeflame." -Fretro
"Bend over for your daily spanking Dank." -Zomrife
"From what I'm told about dank in dms, I don't think he'd be typing if he had boobs." -Kasane Teto (Dank's alter ego)
"Is there any thoughts in Dank’s head at all or is his brain just a toy monkey banging a cymbal" - Zlína
Trivia
Lord Dank has his own personal assistant.
Lord Dank was offered breast milk on at least one occasion; He says it is delicious and helped him not feel sore after a workout thus sparking the debate in mod chat over whether or not each of them would try it.
He frequently does face reveals, and is known by many for being beautiful and wearing cute goth outfits which, according to his boss, is good for business. His vtuber model is also quite fashionable.
His visage captivated Luna, who went full on puppygirl borkdere. His personality also had a very similar effect on Zlína, who reportedly still cannot remain in chat at the same time as him for too long lest her motor functions shut down entirely.
He ate an entire lion once.
Lord Dank is actually a cat in the body of an anthropomorphic rabbit, however, his fursona is a fox. Canonically, he is a yandere as well, it is a shame he wasn't able to make things work with Luna.
In the critically acclaimed, award-winning MMORPG Final Fantasty XIV that Kirin forced Dank and Bananders to play at gunpoint, he enjoys thrusting as a goon class.