View source for Kirin (She/Her)

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| speaker = Kirin (She/Her)
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'''Kirin''' originally joined Weeb's Cafe in 2023 before she left. She rejoined once more on March 8th, 2026.

== Biography ==
Public opinion on '''Kirin''' is generally '''positive'''. She is level-headed, silly, and performs altruistic acts like re-opening the Weeb's Cafe wiki after it was unfairly shut down by the Fandom Wiki team. Operating on an internal clock of about 30 hours per sleep/wake cycle, she is constantly ruining her sleep schedule.

It is currently speculated that '''Kirin''' works for the '''[[wikipedia:Soviet_Union|USSR]]''' given that she was able to seamlessly recreate a known '''Russian''' <s>''prison''</s> '''apartment complex''' in the Weeb's Cafe '''Minecraft''' server even down to the "'''Penor Inspection Chamber'''." When she inevitably makes it big and becomes a millionaire, she promised by buy '''[[Bananders]]''' a life-sized plushy of Itachi Uchiha (including chicken) so that Bananders can drive in the carpool lane.

'''[[0-Z3U5]]''' allegedly gave her the mod roles after she begged him and offered to commit illicit acts even further than her usual salacious dances. '''Kirin''' vehemently denies that she did any such thing, stating that the so-called evidence '''Zeus''' provided was, in fact, doctored. The residents of Weeb's Cafe are still deliberating the validity of her statement.
[[File:Allegations.jpg|none|thumb|Courtroom sketch of the receipts of '''Kirin's''' DM history with '''Zeus''']]

== What People Have to Say About Kirin: ==
"I want to hate on the gal, but I can't. She's just too '''good'''." - '''[[0-Z3U5]]'''

"Responsible and also an aunt, has '''twink stomach disease''' so she can't eat spicy food. Bad sleep schedule. Loves seafood but can't swim." - '''[[Bananders]]'''

"'''Kirin''' deserve '''ketchup roles'''. (Referring to mod role at the time)" - Cube

"'''Kirin''' is 8/10" - '''[[0-Z3U5]]'''

"'''Kirin''' is giving me a virus" - '''Sora (Girl)'''

"'''Kirin''' is a lady?" - '''Gab'''

"The members here are like - '''Nicest''': gab, '''kirin''', cheems, chel" - Anonymous

"We'll kill you '''Kirin'''" - [[Hightsune Mikush|'''Hightsune Mikush''']]

== Trivia ==
'''Kirin''' has a terminal love of [[wikipedia:MILF|'''MILFs''']]. She has stated that any computer that cannot show her MILFs is useless.

When asked if '''Kirin''' would drink '''breast milk''', she has stated that she would "Duel her future child over who gets the milk." And that sometimes children need to make sacrifices for her "gains".

Her special skill is finding niche erotic art, but she cannot look at it; She simply hovers her cursor over it to sense the image like a strange porn jedi.

As a child she first gained consciousness when she felt the divine calling to slay Ifrit at the tender age of 3. She is still on that quest.

She recently held both '''[[Bananders]]''' and '''[[Lord Dank]]''' at gunpoint to force them to purchase the free trial of the critically acclaimed MMORPG '''[https://na.finalfantasyxiv.com/ Final Fantasy XIV]''' using the code '''#Kirin_MILFHunter''' for 10% off.